Anyway... After going in to get my results I actually forgot to share them with people - even my dad! It's not because I'm not pleased, I'm just not really fussed and it's not much of a big deal, although my papa, grandparents and Steve and Deb from the best work experience ever were all exceptionally chuffed for me with beaming smiles.

I really can't put my finger on why I forgot to share my results when people were so very eager to hear them. It's just a thing I did. [it was at this point I received a DM on Instagram off Canon themselves about my competition entry - competition info here - holy bloody hell, lets talk about that can we?! - they wanted my permission for them to share my image on their site and social media, I of course obliged, how fucking exciting is that!! More chuffed about that than a good uni result now. Thanks to Hannah and Stef Michalak for talking about the competition which lead me to get involved in the first place! Back to the main subject...] What I wanted to talk about was self pride, and how evidently I don't much feel it with uni and my tutor even told the class that some people need to feel more confident with their work and be proud of what the present rather than put themselves down. I often do these things because I know there are SO many incredible photographers out there, with their own distinguished style and success and recognition from that, all who I can't compare to because I just dabble in everything and don't really know what I'm doing.

I figured that whenever I feel proud of myself that it's my mom's pride I'm feeling, and I like that. I love more how my dad has told me he's proud of me, without me asking to as I've had to do before... It's reassurance from my best friend that I'm doing well, even though I'm not sure if I really am or not. Him, plus Steve and Deb giving me high praise (as well as the canon thing) makes me feel like I'm doing a good job as a photographer so far, so I should be proud of myself right?

Perhaps I've detached myself from the last project as it became really quite difficult to complete and left me both physically and emotionally drained so I can't feel too proud of something that although I'm pleased with, makes me feel so crappy. Nevertheless I did feel very proud to show my books to Steve and Deb, and dad wants to show it off too.

I'm not sure I can make it to the wisdomous part of the blog post where I give you some advice... Perhaps I too shall work on letting myself feel proud of what I do and get back to you. I guess it's all part of confidence in yourself and your abilities, I don't even have the confidence to talk to people let alone show them things I make.

If you do have some advice on this for myself and other readers then do comment it below :)