Well hello you lovely lovely readers how are you today. I'm in my fluffy cosy dressing gown wishing I never got out of my comfy cosy bed this morning. The night before last I spent the night in London with my art class so it was nice to return to my own bed. It's an annual art trip where we go to London looking at all the huge galleries, taking pictures that may possibly help us with our projects and having general banter.

As I have mentioned before, I love London, there are a million different corners of the city that are so special and unique. Like the skateboard ramps in southwark smothered in colourful graffiti, which is a personal fave as I walk past it almost every time. Wherever I go I always think "that would make an amazing photo!" and I think that even more so in London. I hope to spend more time in London as the years go on, I even hope to go on days out there with my camera trying out street photography since it is so full of quirky treasures. I mean I'd love to live there but it is so expensive and doubt I'd realistically get so financially stable on my own to comfortably live there. Anyway, I thought I'd share with you my latest experience in my current favourite city as the last two days were quite eventful...

Firstly, in true "blogger" style, my outfit of the day, which to be honest I thought was quite "London-esque" and nice, and more importantly comfortable. I really liked my outfit on the first day, I swapped to a grey tshirt for the day after though.

A cream knitted jumper from Primark, black skinny jeans from H&M, blue denim jacket with brown boots and brown tartan scarf from New Look, a brown fur pom pom hat from a Christmas market stall outside New Look and my lovely black and rose gold KitSound "Milano" headphones - which I kept hidden under my scarf when I wasn't using them with the wire underneath my top so nobody knew I had something worth pickpocketing - clever I thought hahaa.

 We got off the train from Birmingham to Marylebone and headed straight to the first gallery. The group consisted of the year 13 art class - 7 girls including me (minus one who couldn't go), The year 12 art class and year 12 product design class. Due to hardly any people taking art or product design it is a very tight-knit trip where everyone bonds and has a nice, mostly relaxing time. The head of art, our second art teacher had to stay in school so somebody artistic could teach lessons, the product design teacher and a pe teacher, just so there was an adult male present for the lads in year 12.He even joked he didn't have to be there and would take people straight home to Birmingham if anyone misbehaved.


The first gallery we visited was the National Portrait Gallery, where I treated myself to a yellow magnet shaped like a camera, which is very me. Yellow is my favourite colour and you all know how I feel about cameras. (I was thinking about them just then and typed "yellow is my favourite camera") Then we headed around the corner to take a group photo. And proceeded to go into the National Gallery in Trafalgar Square. I didn't take my camera with me so every photo was quickly taken on my phone but I still did my best and took another second to frame everything right.

It rained on and off both days we were there, I guess it really showed us the beauty of London in all weathers, and it wasn;t too heavy so it wasn't so bad.

We didn't stay in the National Gallery for very long at all, we got a few rooms in when an alarm went off, I first thought someone stepped too close to one of the special paintings (as I have done before) but then it was followed by a calm recorded voice over saying "a fire has been reported please leave the building." At which point the men and women in suits dotted around at every doorway watching over people told everyone to leave the room and followed us out to make sure everyone evacuated. It was all very dramatic and strange to suddenly see an art gallery so rammed with people. Usually everyone is spread out across the rooms so it doesn't really look like many people. But when you're all heading for the door at the same time, it adds up. Luckily I still had one class member in my sight so I wasn't alone as we soon found the rest of the group and went on straight to the Tate Gallery. (where I also treated myself to a small book of 55 photography tips)

The next day we went to the Saatchi Gallery, which had some REALLY weird things... They have an exhibition on right now called "Champagne Life" full of work from female artists but take it from me, there is some creepy stuff in there. Including an actual real stuffed horse that looks like it's stuck on a giant exercise ball, and wax figures that look like they're falling off hospital beds. I apologise to any offence to the artists but walking in and seeing that is shocking - perhaps that's the intention. But when studying art and being told it's about painting, drawing and tone and seeing art like that, it's so much different to what I've grown up identifying it as. However, the art certainly is interesting, despite the initial reaction of "what the fuck."

I bought this postcard from the Saatchi Gallery, keeping in line with my photography related gallery purchases hahaa. I like this because you can't see the faces of the photographers, they could be anybody. And in a weird way, I find it encouraging because I want to be in their position too one day - not an annoying paparazzi, just a normal photographer taking portraits of people or capturing events or street and travel photography. I look at this print and think "goals", even if it does place me on the other side of the camera, because I could be anybody, and I could even amount to somebody behind a camera like these people here.

When we got back to Marylebone station to catch our train back to Brum town after shopping at Oxford Street, we saw our train had been cancelled. Since my brother works for network rail I asked him to find out what happened and there was a fire on the train and a passenger pulled the emergency break. After the conductor shouted at them telling them they'd get fined for improper use, the passenger shouted back "well explain the fucking fire then" and pointed at the flames outside the carriage. Everyone evacuated and the fire was dealt with but trains from Marylebone were delayed until 5pm.

Our teachers took us back on the tube to catch a different train to Birmingham from Euston station but rushing around not knowing exactly what was happening other than our train had been delayed put me in a panic, I feared I'd either have an asthma or panic attack. I don't mean to be a drama queen or offend those prone to panic attacks but the way I felt, a panic attack seemed possible to me at the time. I was fast walking and trying to control my breathing, I have zero experience or knowledge of panic attacks but I did feel very uneasy, worried and panicked at not knowing what in the world was going on and where we were going, I just wanted to go home. I was at the back of our group struggling to keep up and listening to one of our teachers whispering under his breath at the gate worker to "take a day off" and "let us on" as the head of art was explaining the situation and showing him our tickets. We were let though and got on the train, it started moving as we sat down and I felt a bit sick but I put my headphones on and soon calmed down.

All panic and aching feet aside, I thoroughly enjoyed another trip to London and look forward to another. I also REALLY look forward to one with my camera to get those shots I always tell myself I'll stop to get one day. As always, let me know your own London experiences, or visits to your own favourite city. Don't forget to follow my instagram account and you can like these photos if you please :)

Firstly, a while ago I decided to stop categorising my blog posts because sometimes it's hard to title it with just one topic or any at all so in the new year I'll just give it a title and send the post on it's merry way. Although I may still let you know which ones will be photography posts.

My dad asked me the other day if I had a bit of a writers block because I posted another blog of photos - I mean I love photography but yes I've been kind of stuck for things to write about, but then I had the idea to write about the fact I have nothing to talk about. I noticed this week that I'm bored. I am grateful that I have been well educated unlike many poor souls out in the world and I turn up every day for my lessons and shut up and get on with it, as I have always done - unless I'm too unwell to stand or hold in my dinner obviously.

But quite frankly I'm bloody bored of it. Waking up early to groggily walk to a building full of people that annoy me (until recently with my new pals - they're the only thing that keep me sane, and Mrs Klerides my media teacher #TopBants) and then finally returning home and having to sit there and continue working - I don't enjoy it. And it's the main cause for my many mental breakdowns.

For the most part, school has never been tremendously enjoyable for me. It makes me want to hide in my shell and makes me feel underappreciated. It's a bit of a shit hole really. I respect that other people would die for this privileged I have but they can have my place if they so wish. I'm bored of this routine - I can't remember doing anything with my life other than school and the fun days out and holidays fitted in around it. I want to try something new. Get a job, learn to drive, drive to said job. Get my own place and decorate it just the way I want. Travel to new places with my camera and capture the beauty of the world I can't go and see yet because I'm stuck in this rut.

And you're ever so mistaken if you think I'm going to uni - at any point in life. I've said to people I'll take a gap year to think more about photography courses for the year after but really, I'm having a gap life to get hands on with photography and dive straight in. I need something new and more stimulating to wake up for in the morning.

It's driving me completely bonkers, I can't wait until my last exam is over! Yes I'll then have the almighty struggle of passing my driving tests but that's something I've always wanted to achieve so I don't mind that struggle. And the struggle of finding an employer that has some part in photography - my social anxiety and lack of conversation skills are a barrier I'm willing to nervously break in order to get myself an income off anything to do with photos - really, I'm prepared to even start at the bottom printing off someone else's photos before I get to conduct a photoshoot or sell prints of my own.

I want to one day be able to legitimately call myself a "photographer" (or even a blogger while we're at it) and I'm not waiting any longer to get started on that road - as much as 3 years at uni will probably help.

Please, if you have any advice on finding jobs, getting interviews or any suggestions of potential work places in Birmingham (be it like Max Spielmann prining shops, Jessops camera selling shops or a studio I really don't mind where I start as long as I get out of this school routine) do let me know in the comments below or on Twitter. Any tips would be much appreciated. Or you can start a conversation - are you bored of school routine too?

Hello! What a week I have had! First, Carrie favourited my tweet and then used it in her video!!!! OH MY GOD!! She's one of the very first people I subscribed to on my youtube channel, which I initially made 4 years ago just so I could subscribe and like and comment on peoples videos so I could show them I enjoyed what they made. And then, the official twitter for Mr Joe Sugg's graphic novel Username Evie retweeted my tweet!! And he runs that account himself! So of course that tweet got a lot of eyeball and favourites, I can't believe it! It's actually INSANE! Wow, my twitter is on fire. Do follow me there, @Bekloukat of course.

Anyway, other than those two absolutely incredible tales that I will surely tell my grandchildren at Christmas dinner from "The Magical List Of Totally Awesome Things Grandma Beky Did In Her Youth", I returned to sixth form college. My last year of school. Whaaaatttt?! I'm beginning to realise that what my parents and literally every adult ever has told me: "Time flies by so fast" and that old chestnut "school is the best years of your life".

The truth I'm now starting to see in the second saying is even scaring me a bit, because every year of school leading up to these last two have been horrible. With bullies, alienation, my best friend moving so so far away, 3 different counsellors and my mom passing away, I can safely say that my school experience has been rather shit. Until I got to sixth form where rules were a little more loose and I could stretch the borders and find myself, express myself and make myself. For sure the best part of sixth form has been finding the greatest friends I thought I could never have (and a cheeky 3 month visit from the best friend really made my year).

I shan't fill you with more soppy platonic love so I shall link you to this here friendship post which we all know and love.

School, or in my case sixth form really is showing to be the best years of my life. After summer I felt my life had lost some purpose and routine as I had nothing to do, day in and day out and I became really bored and fed up with it. But sixth form gives you something to do. It's bloody tedious and stressful but you have something to occupy your time with. And I have my friends which I get to see every day - and I love those guys. Although the business does have an affect on my time communicating with Gemma, but lets face it, absolutely nothing can separate us at the end of the day.

And now I'm lost again, my friends plan to stay another year to solidly secure their a levels as best they can or go off to uni but I've always been repelled by every kind of aspect of university and now I don't know where to go, all I know is that I want to take my camera with me.

Anyway - tell me about your best times at school, whether it was in nursery or university or at some point in the middle, let me know your favourite hilarious moment. I'm sure that will keep us all going until at least Tuesday. *shows bicep* Power on through Monday loved ones! We can do this.

Today I went to town to sit in a chair and donate some of my blood to help others who are in need of it. As I am healthy and above the recommended age/height/weight I figured "what harm can it do?". Yes it was a little uncomfortable and I was nervous until I left the building but overall, it was a rewarding experience.

At my mother's wake my dad stood up and asked everyone to consider signing up for organ donation as it was something she believed in strongly as a nurse, knowing the benefits new organs have for people and explained how she was devastated she had to come off the register because her organs had been taken over by cancer. I took this in and burned it into my mind to sign up as soon as I was old enough and one night, on an outburst of motivation, I grabbed the laptop and signed myself up and found that I could still help save lives with my contributions while I was still alive.

My dad had given the week before due to following me to support me and my bravery but I was asked my weight which I had no idea of so they rejected me, asking me to weigh myself and come back if I was within a certain bracket because young females are more at risk of fainting if they don't have much blood volume.

Thankfully I was fine so I went back the week after and met a lovely nurse who did the entire procedure with me. Everyone there is so nice and friendly and it's a real comfort to the nerves. My health check was fine and I was given the all clear to go through and sit waiting to donate. Laura, the nurse who asked me the questions, sat me down and checked my vein. I have a very good vein at that, which she said will be great to keep on taking donations from. She proceeded to insert the needle and take some samples for tests then began letting the bag fill. You only have one needle in your arm the whole sitting, it hurts going in because it has to get to the vein under your skin but other than that the pain doesn't intensify anymore than what you've just had, it's a small, bland discomfort of having a small tube in your arm taking some blood out.

As long as you do the recommended exercises throughout your donation and a little while after, you don't feel faint. I opened and closed my hand (that was the same side the donation was coming from), clenched and unclenched my bum and crossed my legs over each other over and over and tried not to think about the needle/tube coming out and I felt fine apart from a little bit of short lived shakiness. (unlike my dad who forgot halfway though and had a moment of light headedness when the needle came out) Naturally, it hurt to rip off the plaster after the advised 6 hour period and I have a small hole in my arm where the needle was, which will surely heal in no time, but I had no bleeding and as long as I don't keep my arm bent too much for too long and don't lift heavy items my arm doesn't hurt.

As an introvert it can be a little lonely and isolating when you're sat within a group of people. Wanting a bit of alone time or wishing nobody directly asked you a question you hadn't really considered an answer to. Or when you're in just the right mood and with the right people that you feel comfortable with it can still be very draining to have to socialise for a whole day. Even just 6 or so hours at school I have to take about an hour when I get home to just sit to myself before I move on to doing something with myself like washing up or pulling my homework out of my bag.

I've recently had a busy weekend full of socialising. I had a sleepover at one friends house and went from there to another friends house to sleepover there. I had 5 minutes to go home and drop off my bags before going to see my cousins at my grandparents house before they left for their home again. Another 5 minutes to empty my bag and fill it with my purse and other little essentials to go and see a movie (paper towns, it was amazing).

After that weekend I was in some serious need of home and alone time to recharge and recover from the non stop socialising. Don't get me wrong, I love my little cousins and my friends are bundles of fun but as an introvert, that was an absolutely overwhelming jam packed weekend.

Two of my best friends - who have been best friends with one another for 13 years? - have a few opposites amongst their similarities. One is tall, the other is short. One is blonde, the other is brunette. One is introverted, the other is extroverted. This close contrast I see nearly every day in texts or at school while we're not on a break. It's interesting to see two points of view, for example, we had plans to go out one day to the park during half term and while one friend was excited to meet up and go out, the other said she was happy to have a week away from school to do nothing, sit in and watch films and what have you. I laughed because we had plans that very day and the day after but it was interesting to see how different people felt about having plans.

Nevertheless, I feel I have now recovered from my oh so social weekend, feeling more chipper and more likely to accept another invitation out hahaa!

I'd like you to make note of todays picture and look after your introverted and extroverted friends accordingly, we are all different after all and humans need a little bit of lovin'. If you can't quite decide whether you are more introverted or extroverted I've taken the liberty of linking a quiz for you [here] and [here]. I took the tests myself and it seemed pretty accurate.

Let me know whether you're introverted or extroverted or if you have any I vs E stories. :)